Misconceptions
by The Smoose
Summary: So Sara and Grissom really do go back a long way. Thanks to Peggy47 for the name idea! Non main CD
1. Some old fogie who idolises bugs

Misconceptions

**This is based on Grissom and Sara having a relationship way before she moved to Vegas. Thanks to Peggy47 for the name.**

Sara Sidle stepped in to the cool auditorium, away from the baking sun of San Francisco summer. Even wearing a thin strappy tank top and shorts wasn't making it any easier. Looking around, even though she was early, there was a person sitting on the front row. A young looking man with brown curly hair, wearing a blue polo top and jeans. He was engrossed in some notes but looked up when the auditorium doors snapped shut. He turned to look at Sara and she saw that he had the most startlingly blue eyes and a cute chin dimple.

"Hello." He called to her and then turned back to his notes. Sara walked towards him and sat down a few seats away from him.

"Hey. You here for the Forensics seminar?" she asked him. He put his notes down and turned in his seat to face her, placing his hand on the back of the chair between them.

"Are you?" he smiled. Sara tried and failed to hide a grin.

"Yeah, I was forced to come as part of my Physics degree course. Really didn't want to come though. Apparently," she leaned forwards, as did he, and dropped her voice even though there was no one else in the room "this Dr. Whatever is just some old duffer who idolises bugs." She grinned and leaned back. He raised a lone eyebrow and Sara tilted her head "Have you ever been to one of his seminars before?"

She put her hand on the same seat back as him and brushed his fingers lightly, making his face redden slightly "Uh…a few…you know…they were…ah…ok." She thought he looked cute when he was flustered. A few more people had come through the doors and were getting seated. "How many people do you think are coming?"

Sara looked around, counting the people "I think this is it, I counted the people on the register outside. Hey wait," she snapped back around to him "what was your name again?" she was pretty sure she's never seen this man around campus before.

He proffered his hand "Dr. Whatever, A.K.A, Dr. Gil Grissom, the 'old duffer who idolises bugs' pleased to meet you." She shook his hand and he got up, grabbed his notes and walked up the steps to the stage, leaving Sara in silent bewilderment. Once at the podium, he cleared his throat to get everybody's attention. "Good morning everyone, my name is Dr. Grissom and I'll be talking to you today about Forensics."

Three hours later when the seminar had finished, Sara stayed behind and waited until everyone else had left so it was just her and Dr. Grissom. He was putting his stuff in his briefcase and she walked up to him.

"Dr. Grissom?" he turned to face her and smiled when he saw who it was.

"Miss Sidle, you were very good in the lecture, you asked some really good questions, come to think of it, you answered some really good questions. You should have been up here with me. What can I do for you, and please, call me Gil."

Confused as to why he wasn't mad or upset that she had insulted him made her speechless for a moment, that and his eyes. "Oh, ok, well I just wanted to apologise for what I said before, about the old duffer thing."

"Forget about it; besides, if you hadn't said it you still would have thought it." He said, picking up his briefcase.

"I wouldn't, well not the old part anyway, you don't look a day over 25." She gave her gap-tooth smile that she rarely gave anyone else, so self conscious was she of her front teeth.

He blushed again "Well thank you Sara, I'm 38 actually." He had no idea why he'd told her his real age. "Listen, I'm here for another two weeks, would you mind showing me around a little?"

Sara nodded and they walked side by side out of the auditorium.

After she'd shown him around, they ended up at a coffee shop near the college. They talked about cases Grissom had worked in Vegas and he was thrilled at the enthusiasm she showed in his stories. As they finished their coffees, neither wanted to leave. They finally had to when the remains of the coffee began to solidify at the bottom of the mugs. They stood outside and Grissom tuned to Sara.

"So, I'm in Frisco for another two weeks," he moved forwards to brush 'something' off her shoulder "maybe you could show me the night life too?" his hand lingered on her shoulder.

"I think I could do that. Where are you staying?" she liked the feel of his hand on her skin.

He removed his hand to point at a building next to the college. "In the dorms, room 202. The Dean thought it'd be 'fun' for me to mix with the students. How does tonight sound?"

"Sure, I'm in room 215 down the hall. I'll come get you at 7:30? Wear something…smart/casual." She turned and started to walk to the dorms.

Grissom called after her "Isn't 7:30 a little early for the night life?"

She smiled back at him "I'm taking you to dinner first, and you're paying." She waved and turned the corner of the street.


	2. An inner argument

Sara knocked on Grissom's door at 7:15 and was surprised that he was fully dressed waiting for her. Her stomach did a back-flip when she saw what he was wearing. A crisp dark blue shirt that was unbuttoned to his chest and black jeans. Her jaw dropped and he grinned at her. "You're early." He said.

Her head snapped to his eyes and she nodded. "You want to come in for a drink first?" he asked. She nodded and he stepped back to let her in. "What would you like? I've got…well to be honest, I've got water or coffee. No alcohol on campus, right." Sara snorted with laughter and sat on the sofa.

"Yeah, right, everyone follows that rule. I'll have water, thanks." He handed her a bottle and sat beside her on the sofa.

"So where you planning on taking me this evening?" he asked her. She smiled and wagged her finger at him.

"Now that would spoil the surprise wouldn't it? I'll give you the directions if you drive." Grissom nods at her and stands up, offering her his hand.

"Well, let's go then, I'm starving." She takes his hand and they walked to his car.

They arrived a short while later at a small restaurant called PJ's. Grissom parked his car and ran around it to open Sara's door. "Thank you Gil, no one's ever opened a door for me before. You're a real gentleman." She patted him on his bare forearm and a spark flew into her stomach. He must have felt it too because his face reddened slightly and he cleared his throat.

"So, what kind of stuff do they serve here?" he asked, locking the car and hovering his hand over the small of her back as they walked to the entrance.

"Seafood mostly, but there's other stuff too. Oh," she clapped a hand to her mouth and stopped making Grissom put his hand on her back a little above her rear "You're not allergic are you?"

He was a little hazed and concentrating on where his hand was. After a moment, he removed his hand and registered the question. "N…no, I'm not allergic, I love seafood." He stuttered.

He hurried forwards and held the door open for her again. She beamed at him. A group of young men rushed through the door before Gil could and one said, rather loudly, "Dude! Keep that up and you're definitely getting to third base!" and then nearly threw up in the bushes next to the building. Still watching the group as he walked through the door, he bumped into Sara and nearly knocked her over. He instinctively grabbed her waist to steady her and she grabbed his forearms, the electricity shooting through her again at the contact with his skin.

"Sorry," he mumbled "You OK?" he didn't let go of her waist. Her top had hitched up a little, exposing some of her stomach which his fingers were now holding.

"Yeah," she gazed into his startlingly blue eyes, "You can let me go now Gil." They had drifted closer together and now they were mere centimetres apart.

Grissom opened his mouth to say something, but a waitress interrupted them "Can I help you two?" Gil removed his hands as Sara stepped towards the woman.

"Yes thank you, a table for two please." Sara said. The woman nodded and motioned for them to follow her.

Grissom pulled Sara's chair out for her to sit down and they sat down opposite each other and the waitress asked if they wanted anything to drink. "Two iced waters please." Gil ordered.

The drinks came, they ordered the food and they sat in a comfortable silence, occasionally glancing at each other and swapping smiles. After a while, Sara excused herself from the table and headed to the bathroom. Grissom sighed as the door closed behind her and he found himself tapping the table impatiently.

"Get a grip Gil, she's your student" he said to himself

"_Technically, she's a student of the college you just happen to be attending for two weeks. You're not getting paid by the college to be here, so she's not your student" _replied a voice in his head.

"OK, what about the fact she's 15 years younger than me?" he argued

"_The answer's in the question, age is just a number and besides, she said it herself, you don't look your age. You've taken care of yourself. She likes you and it's damn obvious you like her."_

"Yeah but…"

"_Stop arguing, you won't beat me. You know I'm right. For once, follow your heart instead of your morals or ethics. Live on the edge, even if it's only for two weeks."_

"Well that's another thing, I live in Vegas, and she lives here. Long distance relationships never work. What the hell am I doing? I'm talking about relationships with a woman I know nothing about."

"_Well you learnt some stuff this morning didn't you? For example, you learnt where she grew up, her parent's names…"_

"Oh God, what would her parents think?"

"You OK? You look deep in thought." Sara had come back to the table and noticed Grissom staring at his water glass. Grissom jerked his head up to see the woman he'd been contemplating.

"Oh, yeah, I'm fine. It's nothing." He said.

Sara sat down but didn't look convinced. "What were you thinking about?" she asked, taking a sip of water.

Without thinking Gil said "You." And Sara immediately spat out her mouthful of water. She coughed slightly and Grissom reached out and took her hand "Are you OK?"

Sara waved her free hand at him and nodded, still struggling to breath. He let go of her hand and she immediately missed the feeling. When she had calmed down, she looked at him but he was staring at the table cloth. "So you were thinking about me huh?" he looked up to see her smiling at him, she wasn't upset or angry.

"Why did you agree to show me around Sara? Why did you agree to come out with me this evening?" he asked looking her straight in the eye.

The question clearly shocked her because she opened and closed her eyes a few times with no words presenting themselves. She was just about to speak when the waitress came over to them with their food. They sat in a rather more uncomfortable silence than before while they ate.

They finished their meals and the waitress came back asking if they wanted dessert or coffee. They declined and asked for the bill.

"I wanted to." Said Sara as they waited.

Grissom raised an eyebrow in confusion. "Come again?"

"I offered to show you around Frisco and to come out with you this evening because I wanted to. Plus the fact I insulted you this morning and I needed to make it up to you." She smiled. He smiled back and the waitress placed the bill on the table. Sara reached for it but Grissom caught her hand and grabbed it himself.

"I'll pay Gil, I dragged you out here." Sara said, loving her hand in his.

He shook his head and patted her hand "No, it's the least I can do after you showed me round all day, plus," he rubbed his thumb over her knuckles "you can buy the first round of drinks later." He smiled and let go of her hand. He took the bill and pulled out his wallet.


	3. Typical

**Thanks for the great reviews guys, they're spurring me on. This is a really complicated fic to write and I keep getting writers block. If it's not finished by the time CSI finishes for the season, do you still want me to continue?

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After Grissom had paid the bill, he and Sara made their way back to his car.

"I was thinking," Grissom said as he closed his door "Why don't we drive back to campus and get a taxi everywhere else, just incase neither of us is in any state to drive. I'll pay. What do you think?"

Sara smiled at him and turned on the radio "Why Dr. Grissom, are you planning on getting me drunk?" she giggled.

He looked shocked but quickly realised she was joking. He smirked and shook his head. "No, I just thought it'd be easier for both of us." He started the car and recognised the tune coming from the speakers.

_You know it's true_

_Everything I do_

_I do it for you…_

He quickly changed the station. His sudden movement made Sara look at him curiously.

"I hate this song." He lied. He didn't think romantic songs were the way to go right now.

"OK, strange. Turn right after the next set of traffic lights." She said moving her eyes back to the road. The traffic lights turned to red as they approached them and another song was heard.

_I feel it in my fingers_

_I feel it in my toes…_

Grissom gasped and changed the station again. "What? You don't like this song either? Is there a song you do like?" Sara laughed. He grinned sheepishly at her and waited for the lights to change. When they finally did he turned right and parked in his space at the campus.

_I knew I loved you before I met you…_

"Damn it!" Grissom punched the radio and it turned off. "What the hell's wrong with the world today?"

"What's wrong with you today? How come you keep turning the radio off?" she placed her hand on his forearm to calm him. His face reddened and he diverted his eyes away from her.

"No reason. Come on," he opened his door and then hers "we'll call for a cab from my room."

They entered his room and he got a bottle of water from his fridge. Sara followed him and leaned on the kitchen counter. "What's wrong Gil? You've been acting strange since we left the restaurant." She closed the gap between them "Is it me? Did I do something? Tell me if I did."

Grissom sighed and shook his head "No Sara, it's not you. It's me. Well it's…complicated. Never mind, forget I said anything. Look, thanks for showing me round this morning and taking me to dinner, but you don't have to take me anywhere else if you don't want to. Don't feel obligated."

Sara was staring at him confused "I don't feel like I have to, I want to. Unless you don't want me to…"

"No, it's not that. It's just…nothing. Lets just go out and have a good time." He picked up the phone and called a cab. Ten minutes later, they were on their way to the other side of town.


	4. Should have been a happy ending

**A/N: Woah, this chapter is longer than the whole story put together so far! Sorry it's taken so long to update, but like I said, when I get writers block it's damn hard to get rid of. JOY OF JOYS! My Gran's got me some CSI DVD's for my birthday. 7th June here I come! Also, this fic is set in 1998 and I know the song I've added didn't come out 'till 1999 but I thought it was like the best song of the decade for GSR!

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They came to a bar called _Billy's _and Sara ordered the first round of drinks, she had a beer and Grissom had a Jack Daniels.

"Beer? I didn't think you'd drink beer." Gil said as Sara handed him is drink.

"Why? Did you think I'd have a white wine or something? God, even alcohol is sexist now!" she laughed. Grissom chuckled too.

"Ooh look, a pool table, come on." She tugged on his arm and dragged him to the table.

"You play pool?" Grissom said.

"Don't start. I'll woop your ass Gil and you know it. Rack up." She slid the triangle towards him and he put the balls in the correct order.

Sara was very good at pool, but not as good as Grissom. He pulled off the trickiest shots and potted nearly every ball before it was Sara's turn. She stood in awe, watching him. Every time he bent forwards to get a better shot, she couldn't quite concentrate on anything that was happening on the table. After beating her three times in a row, Sara admitted defeat and as a result had to get the next round of drinks.

The bar was on the other side of a wall next to the pool table but couldn't be seen from it. Sara had been a little while so Gil went in search of her. He found her with the drinks at the bar standing next to a man. The man was getting very close to her and she kept pushing him back but he just grabbed her arm and leant towards her more. Grissom rushed up to her and put his arm around her waist.

"Hey honey, you ok?" he said to her. Sara spun around and saw a look on his face that said '_play along'_.

Sara smiled at him and kissed his cheek, an action that should have sent shivers up his spine but he felt so comfortable with it and so did she. "Yeah I'm fine, just getting the drinks." The man next to her seemed to be very drunk and confused.

"Wait, y…you're with h…him?" he said, pointing a shaky finger at Grissom. Sara moved her hand to entwine with Gil's.

"Yes I am. Now if you don't mind, we'll be going." Sara picked up the drinks and still holding Grissom's hand, made her way back to the table. She sat down, still hand in hand and noticed the man staring at her. "God, what a creep, he's still eying me up." She huffed.

"I don't think he believes we're together." Grissom said into his drink.

"I don't see why not. Oh, I love this song," she said, listening to the tune coming from the speakers "come on, dance with me." She stood up.

"Uh, I don't dance well. At all. It's a very bad thing to witness." He chuckled.

Sara grabbed his hand "Yeah well I'm a great dancer so I'll make up for your two left feet. Come on Gil." She pulled on his hand and he finally gave up.

They stepped into the dancing area and Sara wrapped her arms around Gil's neck. He had no other choice but to place his hands, rather awkwardly, on her waist. The song started and he suddenly felt at ease.

"_Maybe it's intuition  
Some things you just don't question  
Like in your eyes, I see my future in an instant  
And there it goes, I think I've found my best friend _

I know that it might sound  
More than a little crazy  
But I believe...

I knew I loved you before I met you  
I think I dreamed you into life  
I knew I loved you before I met you  
I have been waiting all my life"

They drifted closer together and Sara rested her head on Grissom's shoulder. He moved his hands to her hips and they swayed around the dance area. Gil closed his eyes and sighed contentedly.

"There's just no rhyme or reason  
Only a sense of completion  
And in your eyes, I see the missing pieces  
I'm searching for, I think I've found my way home

I know that it might sound  
More than a little crazy  
But I believe

_I knew I loved you before I met you  
I think I dreamed you into life  
I knew I loved you before I met you  
I have been waiting all my life"_

"That guy's not staring at us anymore." Sara mumbled.

"Don't care." Gil whispered back.

"A thousand angels dance around you  
I am complete now that I have found you

_I knew I loved you before I met you  
I think I dreamed you into life  
I knew I loved you before I met you  
I have been waiting all my life _

_I knew I loved you before I met you  
I think I dreamed you into life  
I knew I loved you before I met you  
I have been waiting all my life"_

The song ended and Gil and Sara stopped dancing. Sara looked up at him shyly and he hastily let go of her hips.

"I thought you said you were a bad dancer?" Sara said as she let go of him and made her way back to the table.

"I said I was bad to witness, to be truthful, no one's ever danced with me before so I can't comment on my skills with other people. Me dancing on my own, now that's bad." He chuckled.

"No one's ever danced with you? Not even in school? What about the prom?"

"I didn't go." He said and downed the rest of his drink.

"You didn't go?" Sara gasped "Why not? It's like, the biggest memory of school time!"

"Well," Grissom sighed "I'd been going out with a girl Heather for a while," he didn't notice Sara cringe at his words "and I asked her to come to the prom with me. She accepted. I got all dressed up on the night, drove to her house to pick her up, knocked on the door and was greeted by her dad. He never liked me, I suppose that's why he laughed like he did. I told him I was here to pick up Heather for the prom, he practically pissed himself laughing. I was still stood on the porch. He finally stopped laughing only to tell me that she'd already left with her boyfriend, who happened to be my best friend at the time." He leaned back on the chair and put his arm on the back of Sara's like he had done the first time they met. "Apparently, they'd been seeing each other for two weeks, a few days after I asked her to the prom and she still accepted. I really didn't feel like going after that, so I just went home and drowned my sorrows." Grissom downed the rest of his drink and let out a small burp "J.D. became my friend for a while. Anyway, enough about me, how did you get so good at dancing?" he leaned back again and started playing with a thread of her sleeve.

Sara smiled at the unconscious gesture and chuckled. "When I was about 6 years old, my mom though that it'd be good for me to get outta the house for as long as possible after school, so she signed me up for dance classes. I hated them, but I did them every day for 8 years. I was best at ballet and I won dozens of competitions, I'll show you my awards if you want when we get back." Her cheeks reddened as she had just basically invited him to her dorm room.

Gil smiled and nodded "Sure, I'd love to see them. How come your mom wanted you out of the house?" he saw her face drop and she looked at her hands. He reached out for her hand and held it, his thumb rubbing her knuckles. "Hey, it's ok. You don't have to tell me. It's obviously a touchy subject. I was just curious." Sara looked at him and showed a nervous grin. The thought of her parents had obviously upset her because her eyes were glassy. Grissom tugged on her hand and wrapped his arms around her as she let out a sob. Sara nestled her head in his chest and silently cried. They stayed like that for a while and then Grissom tapped her shoulder once she had calmed down. "Come on, I'll take you home. It's ok."

Sara shook her head "I don't want to go home yet, can we go for a walk or something?" she stood and walked towards the door. Grissom followed and found her outside leaning against the car. "There's a park around the corner, can we walk around there for a while? I just want to get some air." Sara said, not looking at Grissom.

"Sure." Gil said. He walked up to Sara and looped his arm around hers. Sara tightened her grip on his arm and they walked together to the park entrance.

* * *

After about half an hour of walking and casual chatting, Gil looked up at the sky which was still pretty light considering it was nearing 10 o'clock.

"What are you looking at?" Sara asked him.

"It's gonna rain in a minute." He said.

Sara laughed and raised an eyebrow at him "How do you know just from looking at the sky?"

"It's not just that." He said, mock pouting at her humour. "The humidity's dropped, wind's picking up, sky's darkened and," he nudged his shoulder against hers "I checked the weather forecast before we came out." All of a sudden the heavens opened and they were drenched within seconds. Grissom, knowing the forecast for the evening, had brought a jacket with him. Sara had nothing except a now sodden jumper covering a thin t-shirt underneath. Gil grabbed Sara's hand and pulled her towards a gazebo standing a few yards away on the grass. Once under cover, he looked at the drenched woman standing next to him. Her hair was now plastered to her head, some of her eye-liner had run and her jumper was soaked through. Grissom on the other hand was bone dry apart from his hair and a wet waterproof jacket. He shrugged off the jacket and draped it around Sara.

"Thanks. I guess you were right, it is gonna rain." Sara chuckled. "How come I'm the one that get's stuck in the rain when I live in Frisco? You're here for two days and you're prepared. Stupid tourist." She smiled and noticed Grissom's flat hair. Although now drenched, his curls were still present. Sara reached up and ran her fingers through his wet hair to style it funnily. She flicked the front up and made a kind of Elvis quiff that stayed stuck up for about two seconds before flopping onto his forehead. Grissom hadn't taken his eyes from hers since her hand had made contact with his hair.

After messing with his hair for a few more minutes, Sara moved her hand down to his cheek and wiped some of the rain drops away with her thumb. Her hazel eyes locked with his electric blue ones and once again she was lost. Gil reached over to her and dug inside the pocket of his jacket. He pulled out a pack of tissues, extracted one and wiped away the eye-liner that had run down Sara's face. He stood closer to her and tenderly cupped her cheek, still wiping below her eyes. Sara grabbed his hand to stop him and moved closer to him. They were now so close that they could feel each others warm breath. Gil took the final step and brushed his lips tentatively across hers. The kiss was so soft Sara barely felt it but it was soon replaced with a braver one. Gil wrapped his arms around her under the jacket and she snaked her arms around his neck, deepening the kiss. Sara's tongue poked out and traced Gil's lips, asking for entry to his mouth which was instantly given.

Sara pulled back from the kiss, breathing heavily and with a huge grin on her face. Grissom rested his forehead against hers and tried to calm his heart rate. "That was…intense." Sara whispered. Gil chuckled and kissed the tip of her nose.

"Yeah, it was. But in no way unpleasant." He smiled and kissed her again with all the passion he possessed. Sara pulled back and looked at him.

"Do you want to come back to my room for a drink?" she asked him. He nodded and took her hand. The rain had stopped but was still threatening to come again. "Do you want your jacket back?"

"No, it looks better on you." He smiled. They walked hand in hand back to the car and then drove back to the college. The college had a sort of open door policy, so basically you could come and go as you pleased but it was your own fault if you missed classes or failed exams etc. The Dean said it was a good way to teach responsibility. Surprisingly, most people passed exams and rarely missed classes so it was obviously working.

They entered Sara's room to find that her roommate was, thankfully, not there. She must have gone to her boyfriend's for the night. Once inside the room, Sara shrugged off Gil's jacket and laid it on a chair to dry.

"What can I get you? Do you want to follow the non-alcohol rule or shall we be rebellious?" she asked him, crouching down to look inside the small fridge. "I've got Bud's, Fosters, or red wine."

"I'll have a Bud please." Gil said. Sara extracted one and held it out for him to take. He grabbed both the bottle and her hand and pulled her towards him, catching her in his arms. "Thanks." He said, taking the bottle from her hand and placing it on the table next to the fridge. Sara wrapped her arms around his neck and pressed her lips to his. Their tongues battled viciously and hands caressed every inch of skin they could reach. Sara started to unbutton Gil's shirt but he stopped her. "Sara? Are you sure? We're not moving to fast?"

Sara kissed her way down his jaw and neck to the newly exposed skin of his chest. "I'm sure that I want you right now." She whispered. That was all the assurance he needed and he claimed her mouth with his, pushing Sara to the edge of the bed and falling onto it.

* * *

"Sara, honey wake up." Grissom shook Sara's shoulder softly and her eyes fluttered open.

"Hey, good morning." She noticed he was fully dressed and got a little worried. Sitting up and wrapping the sheet around her. "How come you're dressed, what's wrong?"

Grissom sat on the bed and dropped his head. Sara placed a hand on the side of his face and he looked at her. "I need to go back to Vegas, today. Something's happened." His eyes were bloodshot because he'd been crying.

"Gil, what's happened?" Sara watched in horror as Grissom broke down, head in his hands.

"It's my…mother." He sobbed. "She's dying. She's been in hospital for a while with heart problems but the doctor called me about ten minutes ago to tell me she might not make it through the night. I'm getting a flight back to Vegas in about an hour." He wiped his eyes and looked at Sara and was surprised to see that she was crying too.

"Oh Gil, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. Can I do anything?" she moved over to him and hugged him.

"No, there's nothing you can do, but I don't plan to be coming back to San Francisco. I'm sorry Sara, there's too many factors to consider. Even if my mother survives, I'll have to stay in Vegas to take care of her and it's not fair on you to come to Vegas to visit me." He cupped Sara's cheek and he looked truly sorry. "Being with you was the best time of my life, but we have to stop this relationship." He was still crying. "I'm sorry, I really am. I've already told the Dean that I'm going so he's bringing in another Criminalist. I need to go." He stood up and so did Sara, still wrapped in the sheet.

"I understand Gil, I do. I'm sorry about your mother, I'm sure she'll be alright." She really didn't know what to say in this situation. The man she loved had to go and would never be back. But it was his mother.

"Here's my number." Gil said, scribbling it down on a piece of paper. "When you've finished University call me, I'll have a job waiting for you." Sara took the bit of paper and placed it inside a Forensic journal that was lying on her dresser.

"Thank you, let me get dressed and I'll drive you to the airport and return the rental car afterwards." Grissom nodded and went to his room to pack his stuff.

After getting dressed at the speed of light and wiping away the stray tears from her face, Sara walked to Gil's room to find him sitting on the bed.

"Gil, come on, it's time to go." Sara whispered. They walked to the car and Sara drove them to the airport.

Once he was checked in, Grissom walked over to Sara and gave her one final good-bye kiss. "I'm really sorry Sara, it's for the best."

Sara hugged him again "You have nothing to apologise for Gil. It's not your fault. We'll see each other again, I'm sure of it."

The speakers stated that Grissom's flight was boarding so with one final hug, he turned and walked to the terminal.

Sara waited at the airport until Grissom's plane had left and even though she knew he couldn't see her, she sill waved sadly. The man she loved was gone. It was for the best, but it still didn't make the pain go away.


	5. Nice to hear from you?

_San Francisco, February 5__th__ 2000_

Sara pulled her phone out of her belt clip and glanced at the name on the screen. It read G. Grissom.

A year. That's how long it'd been since they'd talked last but two years since she'd last seen him. He'd rang her to update her on his mother's condition. She'd got better but as he'd feared, he had to stay in Vegas to care for her. So much had happened since then. Sara had started working at the SFPD Crime Lab and was a CSI II. She's thrown herself into her work since Grissom had left and had a lot to show for it.

"Sidle." She answered as if she didn't know who it was.

"Sara? It's Gil Grissom." It was good to hear his voice again.

"Grissom? Oh, what a surprise! We haven't talked in like a year, I was beginning to think you'd forgotten about me." He smiled when he chuckled.

"And how could I forget about you exactly? How are you?"

"I'm fine, working at SFPD, CSI II, I'm doing great. How about you, how's your mother?"

Grissom felt his breath catch. "She…she passed away a few weeks ago. Triple heart attack. I'm sorry, I was going to call and tell you but work's been really busy and with funeral arrangements and everything."

"Griss, you're rambling. I'm sorry about your mother. I really am." They stayed silent for a while and then Sara spoke again. "So work's been busy huh? Same here. I just had my first quadruple homicide. Is it weird that I got a buzz off it?"

Grissom chuckled again "No, it's not weird. I saw you on the T.V. about that case, you haven't changed much."

"_If you only knew"_ she thought. "I suppose not. Not to be rude, but I'm thinking you didn't just call me to tell me I hadn't changed. What's up Griss?"

"No, you're right, I need to ask a favour of you."

"Go head, I'm all ears. As long as it's not something strange like you wanna do an experiment on me or something."

"Yeah, very funny. Well, something happened a few days ago at work and a rookie got shot because the CSI that was shadowing her left her at the scene alone. She's in intensive care but I need to have an internal investigation done, I was wondering if you could do it because I need an impartial judge. What do you say?"

"Er…sure, I mean I need to sort some stuff out first but I don't see why not. I've got some holiday time saved."

"Some? If I know you, and I think I do, you've got more than 'some' holiday time. I bet you've got at least two month's worth."

"Ooh, so close, it's actually three." She giggled. It was nice to talk to him like the old days again. He laughed and sounded happy.

"So you'll come? Great! Hey, don't worry about accommodation, you can stay at mine, unless that'd be weird for you." He remembered back to the last time they'd been in the same room together.

"Why would it be weird. We're friends, right?"

"Yeah, friends. Ok, well, I need to get back to work now but call me when you have flights arranged. I need you here as soon as possible I'm afraid."

"Well Griss," she laughed, "Put the phone down and I can call the airport and get my ticket. I'll see you soon. Bye." She flipped her phone shut and rested it against her head. Gil Grissom. The enigma. Would it be awkward to see him again? Especially as he didn't know. Rooting in her address book, she picked up her house phone and called the airport for the soonest flight to Vegas. Once she had a ticket booked for the next day she rang her friend, Carrie, to ask a favour.


	6. The reuinion

Sara walked towards the yellow crime scene tape and the large crowd. They were clapping, which was odd seeing as this was a murder investigation. She dropped her bag as an officer lifted the tape for her. She saw Grissom, wearing the same polo shirt and pants he'd been wearing the first time she'd met him, taking photo's of something on the ground and talking to himself.

"Norman pushed," click, "Norman jumped," click, "Norman fell." Click.

"Wouldn't you if you were married to Mrs. Roper?"

Grissom stopped in his tracks and she could see him smile even though his back was turned to her. "I don't even have to turn around, Sara Sidle."

Her stomach did that back-flip thing it did every time he said her name. They hadn't seen each other in two years but he still remembered her voice. He turned and walked towards her. He still looked as young as he had two years ago, maybe even better. "It's me." She answered _"What a lame reply, think of something else!" _"Still tossing simulation dummies?" she asked, placing her sunglasses on top of her head. "There are other ways to tell, you know?"

Grissom dug his hands into his pockets and smirked at her. "How? Computer simulation? No thank you, I'm a scientist. I like to see it." He hadn't stopped grinning since he'd seen her. "Newton dropped the apple, I drop dummies." He let out a breath of laughter and she flashed her fabulous gap-tooth smile at him.

"You're old school." She smirked.

"Exactly, and this guy was pushed."

They were silent for a while and Sara broke it "How's the girl?"

Grissom's face dropped "She's still in surgery she's not doing very well."

Sara sighed "That's too bad."

"God Sara, I have so many unanswered why's."

"There's only one why that matters now, why did Warrick Brown leave that crime scene?"

Once Sara had helped Grissom take photos and collect other evidence, they walked to his car and he drove them to his townhouse. He opened the door and carried her bag for her. "Welcome to my…I mean our home for the next few days." It felt strange to both of them to call it 'their' home instead of Grissom's, but also very nice at the same time. Grissom turned to Sara and smiled. "I'm glad you decided to come."

"So am I, it's just a shame it had to be under these circumstances. I've missed you Griss." Sara said quietly.

Grissom cleared his throat and turned to the living room. "I'll show you the spare room, I've made it up for you." He beckoned for her to follow him and she did so. Her room was reasonably large with a double bed and all the necessities. "The bathroom's down the hall there," he pointed to a door on the left of the hallway. "And if you need me, my bedroom's opposite the bathroom. Self catering kitchen and the rest of the house is open to you as well." He placed her bag on the bed and turned to her. "Are you hungry?"

She nodded and followed him into the kitchen. He pulled out some ingredients and began making something.

"You can cook? I didn't think men could cook!" Sara grinned.

"What? So now cooking's sexist? Alcohol is one thing but cooking?" he smiled warmly and remembered that night at the bar and what it had led to. His smile quickly vanished and he cleared his throat again. Sara had noticed that he did that when he was nervous.

"What's wrong?" she asked him. Before he could answer, Sara's cell phone let out a shrill ring, startling both of them. "Sidle. No. Well there should be some in the fridge. I made some before I left. Carrie, calm down, there's some in the cupboard, just follow the directions on the container. Ok. Tell William I love him and I'll be back soon. Ok. Thanks again. Bye." She closed her phone and realised she'd had the whole conversation with Grissom present. He had stiffened over the kitchen counter, but shrugged it off quickly and turned to her, handing her a drink.

"Boyfriend?" he asked her in a fake casual voice.

She ignored the question and took a sip of the drink, which happened to be wine. "What's for dinner then Chef Grissom?".

He smiled but noticed her avoidance of the question. Maybe this William was more than just her boyfriend. What if she was married with kids? The thought saddened him even though it shouldn't have. They hadn't even had a proper relationship. It had been a one night stand, as much as he didn't like to think of it as one, that's what it had been. He shouldn't be feeling sorry for himself, he should be happy that Sara had managed to move on.

"We're having pasta with broccoli and tuna mayonnaise. Don't make that face," Sara had screwed her face up into a look of disgust "it's very nice. Now come here and make the tuna mayo."

* * *

I might add that I wrote the actual CSI scene from the top of my head, yeah, I am that obsessed I have actually memorised every major GSR scene since season 1. That doesn't mean I'm sad, does it? 


	7. Ouch

**Please read this first!!! **I am making a sort of competition to be included in this fic in the last few chapters. I'd like your thoughts on the perfect GSR song and it will be included in one of the last chapters for a special purpose. Sorry, but here is the small print: I don't accept any of the following songs: Nickelback: Far Away (perfect but too predictable) Counting Crows: Accidentally in love (again, too predictable) or any by Boston, Jon Bon Jovi or Brian Adams. Any others are ok. I'll pick three and include the person's name in the dedications. All entries in before June 7th please (Note: this is not the date of the last chapter, just the date for the songs and also my Birthday!!!) thanks everyone!

"Well Griss, you were right, dinner was lovely, thanks." Sara said, pushing her cleared plate away and patting her stomach. Gil smiled, stood up and took both plates to the sink to wash them. "You cook and do the washing up afterwards? You're not gay are you?" she joked.

"You didn't ask me that two years ago." He said before he could atop himself. Sara gasped and Grissom groaned in frustration. He dropped his head and slumped his hands into the scalding water. He didn't register the pain in his fists until a few seconds later when he pulled them out and they were a different colour with less skin.

"Son of a… ahhh!" He yelled and shook his hands. "Damn it!"

Sara ran towards him "What happened? Are you alright?" she put her hand on his shoulder.

"Yeah, I just shoved my hands in the skin-singing-off water." He said, showing her his now red hands and half way up his arm.

"Ooh, that's gotta hurt. Come on." She carefully grabbed his arm and led him into the bathroom. "Take your shirt off." She ordered.

"Pardon?" Grissom said, looking at Sara like she was a crazy person.

"I have to remove any material form the burn areas and clean the wounds so take off your shirt." She turned to the sink and turned on the cold water. Grissom attempted to undo the buttons on his shirt but his finger were hurting too much. Seeing him struggle was very funny, Sara thought, but she took pity on him and began to undo the buttons. In the two years they had been apart, Grissom had not lost his physique. He still had rather prominent pecks and abs, but Sara tried not to concentrate on them as Grissom tried not to concentrate on the beautiful woman unbuttoning his shirt. Once all the buttons where undone, Sara turned him and pulled the shirt off his shoulders.

"Ok, now give me your arm." She said. She took his arm and held it under the now icy cold water. Grissom winced but kept his arm there. After Sara had cleaned both arms, she applied some antiseptic cream and told him to go and sit down. "You can't let your arms get near any chemicals for about two days incase they get infected, which means you can't go into work for at least a day. Sorry Griss."

"It's ok. It's my own damn fault for plunging my hands elbow deep into a sink of boiling water. Ah well, I suppose I'd better call Catherine." He picked up his cell and dialled Catherine's number. "Cath it's Gil, I can't come into work tonight, I've burned my arms in the washing up water. It's not funny Catherine! Yeah…ok…you too…see you tomorrow." Flipping his cell shut he walked over to the sofa and flopped down on it.

"Girlfriend?" Sara asked.

"Pardon? Girlfriend? Catherine? Ha!" Grissom let out a bark of laughter "No way! She's my best friend. I mean, sure she's attractive, but I just don't see her like that. Plus she's got a daughter, Lindsay. I love her to bits, but I don't think I could handle kids now." He didn't see the look of disappointment on Sara's face as he said this "Anyway, as we seem to have strayed into the relationship area, are you seeing anyone? What about this mysterious William?"

Sara looked at him and smiled sadly. "No, I'm not seeing anyone. And William, well, I don't really want to talk about it just now. It's kind of a difficult situation."

Grissom placed a hand on hers as her eyes glassed over a bit "Hey, don't worry, you don't have to tell me. I'm sorry to sound heartless and change topic, but you kinda need to go to work now. I need that report done a.s.a.p." he gave her a sympathetic smile and got up, grabbing the keys to his car and walking to the door.

"Where are you going? Didn't you hear me when I said you can't go into work today?"

"Yes but unless you plan on getting to work by magic, you'll need a lift. Come on." He held out his hand and she took it. Through the pain in his hand, he felt a surge on electricity, much like he had done the first time he had touched her hand. She must have felt it too because she blushed slightly and walked to the door.

Half an hour later, Grissom pulled up outside the Las Vegas Crime Lab. Sara was sat in the front passenger seat and looked a little nervous.

"You ok?" he asked, placing his hand on her knee in a friendly way.

She smiled at him and patted his hand "Yeah, I just feel, weird. It's like my first day at school again. No scratch that, no one's hit me yet." She mumbled the last part under her breath but Grissom still heard her.

"What? What do you mean no one's hit you yet? Sara?" he looked deeply concerned but Sara smiled weakly at him and opened the door.

"I'll tell you everything when I get home. There's a lot of stuff you need to know before I leave again." She closed the door and walked towards the door. Grissom rolled down the window and yelled her name.

"Sara, call me when you finish and I'll pick you up, ok?" Sara smiled again, nodded and waved as she walked through the double doors.

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Sorry, this chapter sucked. It was just something to get to the next one. Some pepople might not like the next few chapters, but I can't tell you why because it will spoil it. 


	8. Confessions

Hey guys, thanks for the kind reviews on the last chapter. It wasn't the greatest was it? Anyway, don't forget about the GSR song challenge. Closes on the 7th June. I've already picked one and put it in the maybe pile. I've thought of the special purpose of the songs and you'll find out what it is in the last few chaps.

**Warning: **This chapter deals with child abuse.

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Sara was sat it the break room on her break eating a BLT sandwich when Catherine walked in and took a soda from the fridge. She gave Sara an odd look before turning and walking to the door.

"Catherine? Could we talk for a minute?" Sara called before the blonde woman could escape.

"Sure." She faked a smile and sat down at the table in the chair nearest the door and furthest away from Sara. "You got some new info on the case?"

"No it's not that, I just think we got off on the wrong foot earlier and I wanted to apologise if I seemed a little…well bitchy. I'm only here for a few days at the most and I don't want to hold the record for making the most enemies in the quickest time." She held out her hand for Catherine to shake. "Can we start over? I'm Sara Sidle of the San Francisco Crime Lab, CSI II."

Catherine gave Sara another odd look, but finally relented. She was just being territorial with the new girl. "Sorry, I'm Catherine Willows, CSI III." She shook Sara's hand and smiled at her. "So I hear Grissom pulled you in from Frisco to do an internal investigation on Warrick? How's it coming?" she asked.

"Well I can't really comment on anything, but I'm gonna need to interview the rest of the team about him. Who is the rest of the team by the way? Griss, failed to mention it when we got up." Sara said nonchalantly.

Catherine raised an eyebrow at "when we got up" but decided to ignore it for the moment. "Well, there's me, Warrick, Nick Stokes, average sized Texan, and Greg Sanders although he works in DNA, not in the field. That's basically 'The Graveyard Shift'."

Sara stood up and threw the remnants of her BLT in the trash can. "Thanks Catherine, I'll go talk to them, get this over with."

"Uh, I'm afraid it'll have to wait. Greg's off with the Flu and Nick's at a scene in the mountains so he might not get back today." Sara sat back down and sighed. "You can still interview me though. But maybe we should wait till our case is closed. Anyway, what about you? Where are you staying? There aren't many motels near the building apart from the casinos."

"Oh, I'm staying with Grissom. He said it didn't seem fair that I'd been brought out here because of him and then had to pay for a roof over my head so he's letting me stay in his spare room."

"You're staying with Grissom?" Catherine asked as if what Sara had was in different language. "Man, he's never let me stay over."

They sat there in silence for a few minutes before Catherine spoke again. "Listen, don't take this the wrong way, but don't start something with Grissom, ok?"

"Excuse me?"

"Don't start a relationship with him. He's still getting over his last relationship. Ass hole." Catherine muttered.

"Why? What happened in his last relationship?" Sara inquired. She had no intention in chasing after Grissom while she was here. What would be the point? He'd said it himself, he'd never come back to Frisco.

"Well," Catherine looked around to make sure they were alone. "about two years ago he met this girl in San Francisco while he was doing a lecture on Forensics." Sara's stomach knotted. Did he mean her? Catherine noticed Sara stiffen and furrowed her eyebrows. "Are you ok?" Sara nodded. "Anyway, they spent one magical night together and then Grissom got called back to Vegas for a family matter. He said it hurt him so bad to leave her. He even told me," Catherine's voice lowered to a whisper. "he said he thought she was 'The One'!" Sara, who had been taking a gulp of soda, spat it back out before she choked on it. "Are you sure you're ok?"

Coughing, Sara nodded and stood up. She composed herself and grabbed her bag. "Well Catherine, it was nice meeting you properly this time, but my shift's over and I need to get Grissom to pick me up so I'll see you tomorrow." and with that she left.

Once outside the building Sara pulled out her cell and called Grissom.

"Grissom."

"Hey Griss, it's me."

"Hey, you ready to come home?"

Sara smiled at his choice of words. "Yeah, how are your arms?"

"Well the incessant throbbing has subsided and they're just a bit tender. Have you had anything to eat?"

"Yeah."

"Ok, well I'll be there in about twenty minutes depending on the miracle that is Vegas Traffic at rush hour."

"Ok, bye." She flipped her cell shut and sat on a low wall at the entrance of the car park.

Grissom arrived half an hour later and Sara hopped into the passenger seat.

"So how was you're day dear?" Grissom asked jokingly.

"It was ok. Marginally better than my first day at school. I had a bit of a territory dispute with Catherine Willows and couldn't talk to anyone about Warrick Brown because they weren't there." Sara replied, staring out of the window.

"They weren't there? I leave Catherine in charge for one day and the whole lab disappears?"

"Well I talked to Warrick and Catherine but Nick Stokes is in the mountains and Greg Sanders is sick. Have you heard about Holly?"

Grissom sighed "Yeah, Brass called me. He's the supervisor…well he was, I guess I am now."

Sara put a hand on his forearm "I'm sorry Griss. Can I do anything to help?"

They had pulled into Grissom's driveway and he shut off the engine. "The only thing you can do is to make sure that report gets to the board as soon as possible. It'll bring some sort of closure to us all, especially to Holly's family." And they got out of the car.

Stepping into Grissom's house, Sara flopped down onto the couch and groaned. Grissom sat next to her and looked at her.

"Are you tired?" he asked her.

"Yeah, but also hungry." She mumbled and got up to peer into the fridge.

"Why didn't you say that when I asked you when I picked you up? We could have got something on the way home."

"Because, Mr. Investigator, I wasn't hungry when you asked me, otherwise I would have said "Yes" when first you asked." She rummaged around, pulled out a fruit salad and settled back down next to Grissom on the sofa. Grissom was staring at Sara while she ate the fruit. "You wan some?" she asked when she caught him staring.

He shook his head. "No. I would like to know what you meant this morning when you said you had things that I needed to know before you left again. And what you meant by the hitting comment on your first day of school."

Sara sighed, placed the fruit salad on the coffee table in front of the couch and turned to Grissom. "Ok. I suppose I should start at the beginning. I was brought up in a home where beatings where considered odd if not done more than twice a day. It used to just be my mom and brother that got the worst from my dad." Sara took a shaky breath and Grissom held her hand.

"You don't have to tell me Sara if it's upsetting you too much. I don't want you to feel uncomfortable." Grissom said, stroking her knuckles with his thumb.

"I need to tell you Griss, it involves you as well. Anyway, basically my dad was a drunk. He used to come home from work and go straight to a bar for a good few hours, then come home, beat my mom for something stupid like not opening the door for him or turning the T.V. on for him. Then he would drink some more so that when my brother and I came home from school he would have an empty bottle to beat my brother with. That was the norm until I got to about 10 and my brother left home to join the marines. He got a lucky escape. When he left, there was only me and my mom. I soon found out what it was like for my brother. Before, all dad used to do to me was shout so loud my ears would ring, but he didn't start the beatings until my brother left. That's why my mom wanted me out of the house." Sara wiped away a tear and let out a small laugh. "It got to the point where both my mom and I were on first name terms with all the staff at the A&E. no one ever did anything about it though. Dad would make up the most lame excuses for all the injuries, but no one ever did anything." Sara wiped away another tear and Grissom put an arm around her.

"I'm so sorry Sara." Grissom whispered as Sara started to sob into his shoulder. "I wish I could have been there to protect you. I don't want to sound insensitive, but how do I fit into all this?"

Sara straightened up and wiped her face. "Well, when I was 13 I started menstruating. The day that I started, we didn't have any…uh…supplies, so mom had to go to the store and get some. She never had any money because dad always spent it or never gave her any and she didn't work, so she took about $2 from his wallet when he was asleep and went to the store. When she got back she woke dad. He saw the shopping bag in her hands and started beating on her. I was hiding under the kitchen table but after a few minutes dad dragged me out. Mom had told him that she had bought that stuff for me, so he started beating on me, badly. He was continuously punching my stomach and pelvis. Mom just stood and watched. When he'd finished, he just went back to the sofa and fell asleep. I remember lying on the kitchen floor in a pool of menstruated blood. Mom took me to the hospital, again, and they told me that I had massive damage to my womb and fallopian tubes and a fractured pelvis. When they cleaned me up, they said that I could probably never have kids because of the amount of damage and scarring. Being 13, it didn't really bother me that I couldn't have kids, but as I got older I realised how much it upset me." Sara got up from the sofa and walked to the window. "So, two years ago, when I found out I was pregnant, even though it wasn't planned and I thought I'd never see the father again, it was the single most happiest moment of my life."

"You have a child?" Grissom asked her, walking to her and putting his hands on her shoulders. Suddenly, something clicked in his mind. "Wait…two years ago? That's when we…is it…Sara, am I a father?"

* * *

Ooh, I'm as evil as the writers for CSI aren't I? Leaving it at a cliff-hanger. Mwah ha ha! I'm sorry if Sara's back story was a bit vague, but I'm a bit touchy when it comes to abuse so I didn't want to go too far into it and I know some people don't like it either. If you didn't like this chapter, I wouldn't read the next one. 


	9. Taken Away

**Ok, I said this at the end of the last chapter. If you didn't like the last chapter, don't read this one. There's a bit of depression that some people might find uncomfortable. **

"Sara, am I a father?" Grissom asked again. Sara remained silent but turned to face him. Tears were still pouring down her face.

"Griss, it's difficult." Sara sobbed.

"How the hell is it difficult?" Grissom was shouting now. "If I'm your child's father I have a right to know!"

Sara could have slapped him "Being a parent isn't a right, it's a gift! Some people abuse that privilege like my dad did! You know what? I don't think I want to have his conversation with you right now. Tell me when you've lost the testosterone!" and she ran past him into her room, slamming the door behind her.

"Sara!" Grissom yelled. He chased after her and threw the door to her room open. Sara was curled into a ball on the floor near the bed, having collapsed in hysterics before she could lie down. Grissom immediately sat next to her and tried to put an arm around her but she shrugged it off.

"Leave me alone Grissom! I'm a jinx! It's better for you if I just leave!" she tried to get up but Grissom caught her wrist and pulled her to him so she was now sitting in his lap. "Let me go!" Sara shouted again and again, trying to wriggle free of Grissom's grip but he held on to her.

"Sara, you're not going anywhere. I want to help you. Tell me what's wrong, please." He whispered in her ear. She stopped wriggling and Grissom wrapped his arms around her and whispered words of comfort to her as she calmed down.

"You're not a father, Griss." Sara mumbled.

"What?" Grissom whispered.

"You're not a father." She repeated and began to cry again. "I miscarried Grissom. Our son died before he was even born. That bastard took him away! My own father killed our son!" she sobbed.

Grissom took a moment to absorb what he had just been told. He had had a child, a son. He had been a parent for a few glorious moments, and now it had been taken away from him. Sara was right, being a parent wasn't a right. Her father had proven that. All Grissom could do was hold Sara as she wept and his tears quickly followed hers.

When Sara awoke, it was to find herself and Grissom lying on the floor next to her bed. Grissom had his arms wrapped firmly around Sara's waist and they were facing each other. Her shirt was still wet as was his from both their tears. Sara thought back to the first, and last, night they had spent together. That was what had caused all this. No. It was her father's fault, not hers or Grissom's. Sara extricated herself from Grissom's embrace without waking him, wrote him a note and walked to the lab.

Grissom woke up a few hours later when his back suddenly protested to sleeping on the hard floor all night. He looked around the room for Sara, but found only a note on the pillow on the bed.

_Grissom,_

_I've walked to the lab. _

_I'm going to finish the report on Warrick today, hopefully everyone should be able to talk to me about it, and then I'm going back home tonight. I'll see you later, unless you come into work. Your arms should be ok today, just don't burn them again._

_Sara_

He stared at the note for a few second. Then he scrunched it into a ball, threw it into the trash can near the bed and ran to his car and drove to work.

"Grissom!" the Sheriff called his name as he jogged past his office. Grissom poked his head around the door. He needed to find Sara before she left.

"Yes Sheriff?"

"When you see Sara Sidle tell her she did good work on the report on Warrick Brown and that case she was working with Catherine Willows. There's always a job open for her should she decide to return to Vegas." The Sheriff said, reading the report on Warrick and Catherine's report on Sara.

Grissom's heart stopped. "She's already finished the report? She's gone?" he whispered.

"Yeah, she left about ten minutes before you came in. I figured you already knew that."

Grissom sprinted out of the office and back into the car park. He nearly knocked Warrick over in his haste.

"Hey Griss, you know what's going on with my career? Or are you just bringing complete strangers all the time now to do internal investigations?" Warrick said, halting Grissom's progress.

"Get out of my way Warrick, we'll talk about this when I get back." Grissom growled.

"No Grissom." Warrick stepped in front of Grissom and put a hand on his shoulder "I want to talk about this now! I want to know what's going on!"

Grissom slapped Warrick's hand away and pushed roughly past him. "Believe me Warrick, so do I."

I know some, maybe all of you are disappointed that I chose the depressing road on this journey, but making Grissom and Sara's child turn up and surprise Grissom would have been WAY to predictable and I was going to go with either abortion or miscarriage, and I know a hell of a lot of people are dead set against abortion, hell so am I, so I chose the slightly more depressing option. I'm truly sorry if this chapter has offended anyone and you all have the right to vent at me. I promise that it gets better from here.


	10. Shock

**A/N: **Thanks for the kind reviews on the last chapter. It was really hard to write otherwise it would've been longer.

**Rated M for some naughty words.

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"Sara!" Grissom shouted when he arrived back at his townhouse. "Sara, are you here?" he ran into the spare bedroom she had been occupying, only to find Sara in the midst of packing her bags.

"What do you want Grissom?" Sara sniffed "I told you I was going to finish the report on Warrick and then go home."

"Why Sara?" Grissom asked. Getting no answer from her, he rounded the bed and snapped her suitcase shut and swept it onto the floor. "Dammit Sara! We still need to talk! You cant just run off!" he shouted.

"I need to!" Sara cried "I need to be with William!"

"Who the hell is William? Why is he more important than 'us'? We still need to talk about what happened!" Grissom shouted.

"Griss," Sara pleaded, "you don't understand."

"You're damn right I don't understand!" Grissom yelled. "A few hours ago you told me that I was a father and my son was cruelly taken away, and now you're running back to your boyfriend?"

"I told you, William is not my boyfriend!" Sara was shouting now.

"Ok then, your fuck-buddy! What difference does it make?"

Sara slapped Grissom so hard across the face that he nearly fell over. He stared at her in shock, his jaw gaping. Sara gasped and backed away from him covering her mouth with her hands.

"Oh my God, oh my God!" she mumbled as she turned away from Grissom. "I can't believe I just did that! I'm turning into my parents!" she picked up the suitcase and started to shove her clothes back into it.

Grissom was still in shock and just stood watching Sara. "Sara…" he croaked finally.

"I'm sorry Grissom," Sara began to cry again "I'm so sorry. I better get out of here before I end up killing you."

Grissom walked to her and halted her actions by grabbing her hands. "Sara, stop please." She dropped the clothes and turned to Grissom. There was a slightly red mark where her hand had made contact with his cheek. Sara brought her hand to caress his bruised face and she sobbed into his shoulder.

"I'm sorry Grissom, I didn't mean to hit you, I just saw red." She sobbed. Grissom wrapped his arms around her as she cried.

"It's ok Sara, shh, it's ok. You are not turning into your parents, believe me. Violent behaviour is not attributed to genetics. I provoked you, I'm sorry."

"I need to go Griss." Sara extracted herself from his arms and turned back to her bags. "I need to go back to Frisco. It's William." Sara waited for Grissom to explode again, but he didn't.

"Sara, I'm sorry about what I've said, but can you please tell me who William is?" he said calmly.

Facing Grissom, Sara offered him a weak smile and wiped her tears away. "William…is my father."

Grissom stared at her. "Your father? But when we first met you told me your father was called James, your mother was called Laura and your brother was called Jake. What's going on Sara?"

Sara sighed "After my father beat the crap out of me that last time, the child services finally got involved and I was taken into foster care. I went to dozens of homes but I never stayed long at any of them. They said I wasn't worth the trouble. I never made any effort to get adopted or fostered. The last home I was at, I made friends with a girl called Natalie (1) but we both got separated, she went to some local house with a load of other kids and I went to William Granger and his wife Claire. They were so nice. William seemed to understand what I had gone through, almost as if it had happened to him before. They adopted me when I was 14. William, Claire and Jake got me through it all. After what happened to me, Jake came back and set up home in Frisco. He joined the SFPD when I was 19 and died two and a half years later in a gang war." Sara smiled sadly at the memory of her brother. "Although he was never there when my dad was beating me up, he said the reason he joined the marines was so that he could stop my dad from hurting me and my mom. He used to write me letters, which I never got because my dad would rip them up in front of me. But when I met William, my life changed for the better. He got me to talk to councillors and therapists about what had happened and he listened to all my problems when I was growing up with him and Claire. They listened when I had my first crush, the first time I got dumped, everything. Then Claire died about 4 years ago. William was crushed. I think he's dying of a broken heart, they'd been married for 56 years. Now he's dying Griss, he's been there for me so much throughout my life, I need to be there for him now. To say goodbye."

Grissom felt like a 2x4 had hit him over the head. He had taken this so far out of proportion and for no reason. He had been jealous over a man he had never met and had just assumed was a love interest of Sara's. He had never expected this to happen. Sara was distraught and he hadn't made it any better. If this I how Sara had expected him to act no wonder she never told him she was pregnant.

"What time's your flight?" Grissom asked.

"1 o'clock this afternoon. How am I going to cope with this Griss? William has been the best person in my life for nearly 20 years."

"Do you want me to go with you?"

Sara looked at him. She could tell by his eyes that he wasn't asking just to be kind. "You don't have to Griss, but it would be nice. I think I might be able to handle it if you came." His eyes showed her that he was truly sorry and that he wanted to make it up to her. She caressed his cheek again where she had struck him. He winced. "I'm sorry, I really shouldn't have hit you."

"I'm fine Sara, I'm tougher than I look." He placed his hand over hers and rubbed his thumb over her knuckles. They gravitated closer together, but Grissom's cell ringing broke them apart. "Grissom." Grissom answered as Sara got up and finished packing her suitcase. "Oh, yeah hi Cath. Yeah I know I shouldn't have done that. No, I know, listen, I need to take some personal time off. I don't know, about two weeks. The reason?" he looked up at Sara who had her back to him. "It's a family matter."

* * *

**OMG was this hard to write! I know I only updated about two days ago but I haven't stopped writing since! This is the hardest fic I have ever written!!! I mean look at the time! It's 2:30 am!!! You know what to do, hit the little 'Go' button and tell me if you love it or hate it so far!**

**(1) Guess who! She won't come into it anymore, I just thought I'd slip her in.**


	11. Journey on a plane

Sorry this chapter is so short. Bag loads of writers block plus revising. Had my English exam today. EASY CHEESY!!!! Saying that I bet I'll fail it now! Winners for the song comp are:

Nicole: Rascal Flatts – God Bless The Broken Road

Caitlin: Lonestar – Amazed

Me: Kelly Clarkson – You Found Me

* * *

A few hours later, Grissom and Sara were sat on the plane bound for San Francisco. Sara was a bag on nerves and Grissom was doing all he could to keep her calm.

"Sara, just try and get some rest. You haven't slept in nearly 14 hours." Grissom said.

"How am I supposed to rest Grissom?" Sara asked incredulously "The best person in my life is dying and I'm not there with him!"

"Well worrying yourself to death over him isn't going to help is it?" Grissom took her hand. "Come here." He lifted up the arm-rest between them, undid Sara's seatbelt and pulled her onto his shoulder, putting an arm around her. "At least rest your eyes. Please. I'll wake you when we get there." He whispered.

Sara sighed "Ok I'll try. I'm sorry for snapping a you Griss. I don't deserve a friend like you." She mumbled.

Grissom kissed the top of her head "Yes you do. You deserve a hell of a lot more. Now get some rest." Sara mumbled something incoherent and snuggled deeper into Grissom's chest.

A few moments later, a flight attendant came over to them "Would you like a pillow or blanket for your wife?" she asked.

Grissom didn't know which point to deal with first, the fact that Sara wasn't his wife or that yes they would like a pillow and blanket. He decided that the items were more important than proving the flight attendant wrong. "Uh…yes, just a blanket please." The flight attendant nodded and hurried off to fetch one.

When Sara woke an while later because of turbulence, she found that both Grissom and herself had been covered with a blanket and she was wrapped securely in Grissom's arms. She was getting used to waking up in his arms and it felt so normal to her but at the same time amazing. She lifted her head to find Grissom's baby blue's staring back at her.

"Hey, you're awake. I was going to wake you, we're landing so you'd better put your seatbelt back on." He whispered.

Sara reluctantly straightened up and buckled her seatbelt. She noticed Grissom smiling at her. "What are you smiling at?" she smirked. Grissom reached up and tucked a few strands of hair behind Sara's ear.

"Your hair's all roughed up. You look like you've been pulled through a hedge backwards." He chuckled. Sara swatted his hand away.

"Gee thanks! I'll remember that." she rubbed her eyes and smoothed her hair down. The plane was hit with a sudden wave of turbulence and Sara grabbed Grissom's arm in fright. "Jesus!" she gasped.

"What's wrong?" Grissom asked.

"I…uh…I don't like turbulence. I don't mind the flying, I just can't stand the turbulence." She replied. The plane shook violently again and Sara dug her nails into Grissom's arm.

"Is there anything I can do to help? To take your mind off it?" he winced.

"I don't know. I've always hated it and nothing ever takes my mind off it so I just end up grabbing onto the first thing that comes within two feet of me and…" she was interrupted by Grissom's lips on hers. It was only one kiss and lasted the best part of two seconds, but it still made Sara's head spin and forget completely about the turbulence.

"The plane will be landing in two minutes, please ensure that your seatbelts are securely fastened." The pilot's voice sounded through the speakers around the plane.

"Sorry." Grissom mumbled. _"Nice one asshole! You could have done anything else but that!"_

"S'fine. You only did it to make me forget about the…uh…thing." Sara mumbled, still trying to regain feeling in her legs which had turned to jelly.

"Yeah." Grissom whispered and stared out of the window.


	12. Mr William Granger

Sorry it's taken ages to update. Writer's block's a bitch! Anyway, officially left high school now, done all my exams AND my dad has blessed me with the entirety of CSI on DVD for my birthday!!! Every season so far!!! The second part of season 6 came out the day before my birthday and he had to run out especially to get it! WOOOP! Ok, back to the story! Rather depressing and we finally meet William.

Grissom and Sara sat in a Starbucks in the airport while they waited for a cab. Neither was talking so they just sat in silence taking occasional sips of their coffees.

"Look," Grissom said after a while when he couldn't stand the silence any more. "I'm sorry I kissed you Sara, it wasn't the best course of action and I just wanted to take your mind of the turbulence. I could have done anything else but that and I'm sorry if it made you uncomfortable. I'm here to support you."

Sara could see the sincerity in his eyes and she smiled at him. "Grissom, I know you were only trying to help, don't sweat it. Hey, I think our cab's here." She got up and grabbed her bag from the floor. Grissom followed suit and they headed out of the airport.

They pulled up to an old house in a secluded street and hour later. Grissom was nervous. He wanted to support Sara as much as he could without over stepping the mark. And now he was going to meet the most important person in Sara's life and, even though it was under these circumstances, he wanted to make a good impression. Sara seemed to notice Grissom's nervousness because she patted him on the arm and gave him an encouraging smile.

"Don't worry, you'll be fine." She said. Grissom smiled back and they walked to the front door.

The door opened before they got to it and revealed a fiery haired woman with a tear stained face. Sara dropped her bag and embraced the woman, Grissom just stood there watching the touching interaction.

"How is he Carrie?" Sara asked while trying with all her might to keep the tears from falling.

"He's getting worse Sar." Carrie pulled back from her friend and wiped her eyes. "I don't think he'll go much longer." She noticed Grissom who had stood next to Sara and wrapped an arm around her shoulder.

"Oh, this is Gil Grissom, Gil, this is Carrie O'Donnell." Sara introduced the two. "He's here for my support."

Grissom smiled weakly and offered his hand for her to shake, but Carrie hugged him. "Thank you for being here for Sara," Carrie whispered in his ear. "I've heard so much about you, you're a good friend." Grissom was caught off guard as she let go of him but he managed to speak.

"It's nice to meet you too. I'm just sorry it had to be under these circumstances."

They stood there for a few seconds before Carrie picked up Sara's suitcase and spoke.

"Well, I suppose we'd better go and visit the 'old duffer'." She said in an attempt at humour and they walked into the house.

They put the suitcases down in the hallway and Carrie led them into what appeared to be the lounge. Carrie went in first followed by Sara but Grissom stood in the doorway. Sara stopped when she couldn't hear Grissom's boots against the wooden floor and turned to look at him.

"Griss?" she looked at him.

"I don't want to impose Sara, but if you want me to come in I will." He said. Sara thought she saw something in his eyes, but after a second it was gone. She reached out a hand and took his.

"I don't want you to come in, I need you to." And she hugged him. Grissom wrapped his arms around her and kissed the top of her head.

"Sara? Oh." Carrie came back out into the hall and saw the pair. Sara let go of Grissom and turned to Carrie. "Bill's asking for you and you know how he hates being kept waiting." She smiled and walked back onto the lounge, still holding Grissom's hand.

The first thing Grissom saw was a bed in the middle of the room with an oxygen tank sitting next to it. William Granger was sitting on the bed, leaning against the pillows with an oxygen mask over his mouth. He looked to be about 70 from what Grissom could see, and was extremely thin. Sara stepped forwards, knelt at the bed and took his hand.

"Hey William, you ok?" she whispered.

William reached up and took the mask away from his face so he could talk properly. "I'm fine…darlin'… don't you…worry about me." He brought the mask back up to his face and breathed for a few seconds before removing it again. Grissom noticed he had a very cockney accent. "I though… you were in Las Vegas…for a few…weeks." He coughed slightly and Sara put the mask back on.

Sara wiped away a lone tear but smiled. "I came to see you of course. I was worried about you." She sniffed and Grissom put a reassuring hand on her shoulder.

"I told you darlin'…don't worry about me…there's life in…the old dog yet." He chuckled but that sent him coughing again and he quickly put the mask back on.

"Calm down a little, ok?" she rubbed his arm and stood up straight. "William, I want you to meet someone." She tugged on Grissom's hand and held onto it. "This is my friend, Gil Grissom. Griss, this is my dad."

William smiled at Grissom and held out a hand for him to shake. "It's…well I was going to say it's nice to meet you Mr. Granger, but under the circumstances I'm not sure. All I know is it's an honour to meet you sir." Grissom said.

"Please…call me William or Bill…and it's lovely…to meet you too...Gil. Sara's told me…so much about you…I feel like…I know you…already." William gasped.

"I've heard a lot about you too William." Grissom told him "I'm glad Sara has you in her life." This made William beam at him. Grissom stepped back and turned to Sara. "I'm gonna put the bags in our rooms, you spend some time with William."

"Ok, thanks Griss." Sara smiled.

"I'll give you the tour Gil." Carrie said. "Come on." She lead him out of the lounge and picked up Sara's bag. They went upstairs in silence and Carrie led him through a door on the right. "He only has one spare room but it's big and got two double beds in it." She explained as she put Sara's bag on the right hand bed. "The right one is Sara's so she'll probably want that one and there's space in the closet next to her stuff."

Grissom put his bag on his bed and looked around the room. "Sara's living here?"

Carrie looked at him, puzzled. "Yeah, has been for weeks to look after Bill. I try and help as much as I can but my job's pretty demanding."

"Well how does Sara manage with her job and looking after William?"

"She doesn't. I mean she doesn't work. She quit her job at the crime lab and moved in here to help Bill about a year ago." Carrie said, curious as to why Grissom didn't know this. "Didn't you know?"

Grissom shook his head. "Well I'd appreciate it if you didn't tell her I told you. No offence, but if she'd wanted you to know, she'd have told you." She continued.

"Yeah, sure, I understand." He unzipped his bag. "Well I think I'm going to turn in for the night, if that's ok? Could you show me where the bathroom is?"

Once he'd washed and brushed his teeth, Grissom headed back to the bedroom to find Sara sitting on her bed with her knees tucked under her chin. "Is the bathroom free?" she whispered.

Grissom nodded and was about to ask if she was alright but Sara half ran out of the door and slammed the bathroom door after her. He sighed and changed into a pair of sweat pants and a t-shirt before getting into bed. He left the light on for Sara but was soon asleep.

Grissom awoke a while later to a muffled sound coming from his right. He opened his eyes and noticed the light was off but he could still hear the muffled noise. He then identified the sound as Sara crying but trying to stifle it.

"Sara?" he sat up and squinted into the darkness in the direction of the sound. The sobbing continued so he got up. His eyes adjusted to the dark quickly and he found his way to Sara's bed. "Sara, what's wrong honey?"

"I'm scared Griss." She sobbed. "I'm scared." Grissom wrapped his arms around her as she cried and rubbed her back, soothing her.

After a while, Sara calmed down and Grissom let go, thinking she had gone to sleep, and stood up to go back to his own bed but he stopped when he felt Sara's hand on his arm.

"Stay with me." She whispered. Grissom turned back to her, pulled down the covers and climbed into her bed. She scooted over to the other side and spooned against his chest with his arm wrapped tightly around her waist. Sara sighed and quickly fell asleep.

**I apologise for taking so long before updating, I have re-written this chapter dozens of times before I was happy with it and this is the end result. Let me know what you think because it decreases the devil writers block!**


	13. A down to Earth chat

**I have so many ideas for this story so if I keep it up I don't think I'll finish it for a while and there's gonna be a hellova lot of chapters! OMG it's my prom on the 5****th**

* * *

Grissom awoke the next morning to find his face buried in Sara's hair and the woman herself snuggled against his chest. He stretched out and found his hand was splayed across Sara's abdomen underneath her shirt. He froze as Sara moved and woke as well. She turned to face him and smiled lazily.

"It seems I've been doing this a lot lately doesn't it?" she whispered.

"What's that?" I asked, tactically moving my hand from under her shirt but kept my arm over her side.

"Waking up in your arms." She closed her eyes again. "People will start to talk Mr. Grissom."

Big, flashing, air raid sirens were going off in Grissom's head yelling "Danger area! Run away!" but he ignored them. Sara needed him and his running away was not an option.

"Let them talk Miss. Sidle, I'm here for your support, not to take advantage." He smiled and Sara opened her eyes.

"Well," Sara said and rolled out of the bed. "I'm going to take a shower." She took some stuff out of the wardrobe and headed for the door. "Oh and Griss." She looked back at him. "It's only taking advantage if the advantage isn't wilfully given." And with that she left the room leaving a very confused Grissom.

As Sara was in the shower, Grissom decided to go downstairs and get some breakfast. He entered the lounge, which was adjoined to the kitchen, to find he was apparently the only one up apart from William who was sat on the bed watching re-runs of _E.R._ He heard Grissom enter the room and smiled at him.

"Good mornin'…Gil. How did…you sleep?" he asked.

"Fine thank you. No one else up?" Grissom asked, moving into the kitchen and searching for the necessities to make a coffee.

William laughed. "I'm surprised…you're up…this early. It's only 5:45am."

Grissom came back into the lounge armed with a large mug of black coffee. "Occupational hazard. I'm usually going to bed about now." He took a sip of coffee. "How come you're up this early?"

William smiled. "It's awkward enough…trying to sleep with…17 different pills…circulating through your body. Add that to…the incessant…stabbing pain…every time you breath." Grissom looked sorry he'd asked. "Plus, _E.R. _is on."

Grissom smiled and put his coffee on the table in front of him. "William, I don't mean to sound too forward but, what's wrong with you?"

"Hasn't Sara told you?" William asked.

"I haven't asked and I think the subject too upsetting for her to just say it." Grissom said sombrely.

William nodded and sighed. "Well, it started…off as pneumonia…but it got…worse so I went…to a doctor…had x-rays…and the like…and suddenly I've…got a 3 inch…mass in both lungs…as well as…other parts." He grimaced at the extended conversation and reached for his oxygen mask. After a few deep breaths he continued. "The doctors said…they were inoperable…and I didn't want…to die in…a hospital so I came home. Sara and Carrie…are the only family…I've got left."

They watched _E.R. _for a while before Grissom spoke again. "What part of England are you from?"

William smiled again. "I wondered…how long it'd take…you to ask that. I'm from a little…corner of London…called Enfield. Lived in…Edmonton for…40 years. Came to San Fran…in 1973. Fostered some kids. Worked as a clerk in…some company until…I got ill. That's about it."

Grissom drained the rest of his coffee and went to put it in the sink. "I'd like to go to England one day. Check out the sites."

William snorted with laughter. "Well if you…ever go…steer clear of…Tottenham, Hackney and Dagenham…you'll get the…shit kicked out of you…real hard nuts…down there...not keen on Yanks"

"I'll keep that in mind." Grissom chuckled. He sat back down.

"Gil, I hope…you don't mind…me asking but…is there any history…between you and Sara?" William asked Grissom.

Stunned by the question, Grissom tried to compose himself. "Uh, well, you know we've been friends for nearly three years, first met at a forensics seminar I was speaking at…"

"No, no you know…what I mean."

"Have we ever slept together?" Grissom asked. "I don't think Sara would like me to tell you if we had."

"You just told me." William said. Grissom fell silent. "Did you love her?"

Grissom stared. He thought about it for minute then opened his mouth to answer.

"Hey guys, what you been talking about?" Sara entered the lounge, her hair still wet from the shower, making it curl a little. Grissom stood up and walked over to her.

"Hey, you feel any better?" he asked her. Sara nodded and hugged him.

"Thank you for staying with me last night." She whispered.

"I told you Sara, I'm here for you, I'll always be here for you." He kissed the top of her head. "I'm going to take a shower now. You haven't scuzzed up the bathroom have you Miss. Sidle?" he asked earning him a smack on the arm.

He disappeared out of the room and Sara went and sat down with William. "So did you two have a nice chat?" she asked.

"We did." William nodded. "He's a very…caring man."

Sara smiled. "That he is. I'm lucky to have him as a friend."

William took her hand. "You wish…he was more…than that though."

She stared at him and then shook her head. "Maybe once, a long time ago. Too much has happened since then."

"You mean me."

"No Will. It's got nothing to do with you. It's stuff that's happened between Griss and I. I'm content to have him as a friend."

"Sara," William placed his other hand on top of hers. "darlin', you still…love him. He still…loves you…I can tell. I want you…to do something…for me."

"What is it?"

"You have to…promise you'll…do it…no matter what."

"Will."

"I mean it!" he gasped. "Please Sara." She sighed and nodded. "Promise me!"

"Fine I promise!"

"Thank you, now…I'm gonna…say some stuff…you're not gonna…like but just…hear me out. I've not got…long left in this world…I know that…the point is…I want you…to be happy…and I know…he makes you happy…so please…when I die…go back to Vegas…go with him…try to make something work."

"Will there's nothing to make work." Sara said.

"Yes there is! He…loves you! I know…it!" William said sharply.

"How do you know? Did he tell you?" Sara asked, wondering how William had come to this conclusion.

"That's what…we were talking…about and he was…going to tell me…he loved you but…you came in…just as he opened his mouth! Please…Sara…for me?"

Sara looked at the floor. Finally she spoke. "If he asks me, I'll go."

* * *

**The stuff about London is all legitimate! It's actually where I used to live so I have the knowledge! Trust me, Tottenham, Hackney and Dagenham are really rough. Come to think of it, Enfield's pretty rough as well!**


	14. Quoth the raven Nevermore

* * *

Once Grissom was out of the shower he went in search of Sara. He found her in the kitchen making breakfast with Carrie.

"So then," Sara laughed, "then we searched for the name of the pager and it came up 'Desmond Tutu'!" Carrie nearly collapsed in a fit of giggles and William chuckled. Grissom walked over to Sara and took the plate of toast out of her hand before she dropped it from laughing. He smiled at her and took a piece of toast. "Hey, that's mine!" she whined.

"Doesn't have your name on it." Grissom said, examining the toast. Sara took the opportunity of him holding the toast loosely to grab it and take a bite. "Hey, that's mine!" he smirked. Sara smiled at him and opened the back door.

"You want it?" she waved the toast at him. Grissom nodded. "Then come and get it." And she ran out of the door, out of the garden and down a small set of steps that led to the beach behind the large house. Grissom went running after her and jumped down the steps just as she reached the bottom and the force of his jump caused him to bump into Sara and sent them both crashing into the sand. They landed haphazardly but Grissom turned in time for Sara to land on him instead of the other way around. The toast went flying into the air and flopped onto the sand a few feet away.

"So much for breakfast." Grissom mumbled as he saw the toast lying buttered side down (like they always do stupid toast!). "That's your fault you know."

Sara gaped at him. "How is it my fault? You're the one who knocked me over and effectively smacked it outta my hand!"

He smiled at her. "Ah, all's fair in love and breakfast." Sara's smile faltered slightly as he realised what he said. "I mean…I…"

"I know what you meant Gris." Sara said as she patted his shoulder and got off him. She stood up and offered her hand for him to get up as well.

"Do you wanna go for a walk?" he asked her.

"Sure." Sara nodded. "We can walk off that huge breakfast we had." she picked up the toast and threw it at him. It hit him in the face so he got a mouth full of sand, and toast.

"That's it Sidle, I'm gonna get you!" he jumped at her and she yelped and dodged out of his way, running off down the beach.

* * *

They messed around on the beach for a while and then just walked along it, chatting about nothing in particular.

"Sara?" said Grissom after a while. "Whatever happened to your biological father?" he saw her flinch but she stayed silent. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have…"

"He's dead." Sara whispered. "From what my mother told me, he died in prison. After I…uh…miscarried, he got sent down for GBH." She snorted. "That's the justice system for you. A man murders his unborn grandson and gets imprisoned for GBH for two measly years." She wiped her eyes and Grissom put his arm around her as they continued to walk. "Apparently word got round the prison as to why he was in and they didn't like it so…" the left the sentence trailing, not needing to describe what Grissom already knew.

"What about when you got put into care?" Grissom asked.

She smiled grimly. "Child services wasn't as well equipped as it is now, not that it's in the best of form now, but they didn't have a strong enough case against him and my mother was too scared to say anything. They had enough to take me away though. I hadn't seen them for nearly twenty years, but…I don't know. I thought they should know that they were going to be grandparents. My father wasn't in so I talked to my mother about everything that had happened, about my brother, and then he came home from a bar, saw me and…it was just like old times again. It didn't seem to register with him that I wasn't a kid anymore or that I hadn't been in the house for nearly twenty years."

Sara sniffed and wiped her eyes again so Grissom dropped the subject. They walked on a bit further before Sara stopped and sat down. "I'm tired, rest for a bit." She said. Grissom sat down next to her and she rested her head on his shoulder.

They sat in silence for a while, just staring into the sea before Sara spoke. "Grissom?"

"Mmm?" was his response.

"Do you ever think about the first time we met?" she asked, not looking at him.

He was silent for a few seconds, thinking about how best to answer the question. Finally, he decided on the truth. "Every day."

She raised her head off his shoulder and looked him in the eye. "Do you think if you hadn't needed to go back to Vegas, we'd still be together? Raising a family?"

Again, he took a few moments to answer the question and again, deciding the best route was the truth. "It's the only thing I've thought about since I first set my eyes on you. It's the first thing I think of in the morning and the last thing I think of at night. Sara," he raised his hand and caressed her cheek. "I know this is the worst time to say this, but talking to William made me think about it. I love you Sara." He chastely kissed her. The fire burning in his soul roared. "Our first dance said it all, I knew I loved you before I met you." This time she kissed him, but it was more passionate this time.

"Grissom, I…"

"Sara! Sara!" Carrie's was running towards them, tears streaming down her face along with her mascara.

"Carrie! What is it! What's wrong?" Sara jumped out of Grissom's embrace and ran towards her friend who had crumpled to the floor.

"It's William!" she sobbed. "He's took a turn for the worse! The ambulance took him to the hospital but they were doing CPR when they loaded him in!" Carrie completely broke down and hugged Sara.

Grissom knelt next to the hysterical women and put an arm around Sara's shoulder. "Sara, come on, we need to get to the hospital."

Suddenly, Sara stood up which knocked Grissom over. She rounded on him, tears falling freely from her eyes. "This is all your fault!" she yelled.

"Sara what…" Grissom stammered but he was cut off by Sara's angry voice.

"It's all your fault!" she screamed. "If you hadn't asked me to come on this stupid walk I would have been at home to care for him! I could have helped!" and with that, she fainted.

Grissom jumped to catch her and Carrie screamed.

"Carrie, we need to get to the hospital!" Grissom said, lifting Sara easily and running back up the beach with Carrie in hot pursuit.

* * *

_Sara watched her son sleeping in William's arms on the couch. She smiled and walked towards them._

"_Presently my soul grew stronger; hesitating then no longer_

"_Sir," said I, "or madam, truly you forgiveness I implore;"_

_William got up from the couch, taking the baby with him and made his way to the front door. Sara watched him._

"_But the fact is, I was napping, and so gently you came rapping,_

_And so faintly you came tapping, tapping on my chamber door,"_

_William opened the door and walked through it. The baby started to cry. Sara began to run towards the door, but got no closer to it._

"_That I scarce was sure I heard you." Here I opened wide the door;---"_

"_William, no! Don't leave me!" Sara finally got to the door and flung it open._

"_Darkness there, and nothing more."_

Sara screamed and thrashed around on the bed.

"Sara! Sara, calm down! It was just a nightmare." She felt a warm pair of hands on her shoulders and opened her eyes. Grissom was standing over her, pinning her down while she thrashed. "Sara, please calm down."

She stopped moving and stared at him. "Grissom?"

"It's ok Sara. You're safe now." Grissom sat back down and held her hand.

"Grissom, where am I? Where's William?" she sat up but Grissom placed a hand on her shoulder and pushed her back down.

"You need to stay laying down, you fainted when we were on the beach, you're in the hospital." Grissom said.

"Where's William?" she asked again.

"He's in ICU." Carrie said from the doorway. "He flat-lined twice on the way here, but they stabilised him and he's on a ventilator." She looked at the floor. "Sara, I'm sorry, there's nothing more they can do. You need to decide what's going to happen to him. You're down as his next of kin."

Sara sat up again but this time Grissom didn't try to stop her. "I want to see him." She said. Grissom stood up.

"I'll take you to him." He said. Sara looked at him as if to say thank you and they walked out of the door.

When they got to William's room his doctor was waiting for them. "Miss Sidle? I'm Dr. Turner."

Sara greeted him and introduced Grissom. "How is he?"

Dr. Turner sighed. "He's in a coma. He flat-lined twice on the way here and his brain was deprived of oxygen for too long. I'm sorry, but if he ever comes out of the coma there's more than and 80 percent chance he could have brain damage. I also have to tell you that his records show he has a DNR, but because he's on a ventilator and the fact that he's in a coma, you have a choice to make. There's really nothing more we can do for him."

Sara nodded and more tears escaped her eyes. "Is he in pain?"

"I really can't say. We have him on a morphine drip, but I can't tell you anymore than that."

She nodded again. "Can I go and say goodbye?"

Dr. Turner nodded and opened the door for her. Grissom remained outside and sat on a chair outside the room.

Sara sat down in the chair next to William's bed. He was hooked up to a ventilator and machines were bleeping all around him. She took his hand and rubbed her thumb over his knuckles.

"Hey William." She whispered. "You had Carrie scared back there. She's fine though." She smoothed back what remained of his hair. "I'm sorry." Tears streamed down her face. "I love you William. You're more of a father than that idiot ever was. I'll miss you, dad." She stood up and ran to the door.

Grissom was waiting for her and pulled her into his embrace.

"I'm so sorry Sara." He said into her hair. "I'm so sorry."

Dr. Turner walked into William's room and closed the door. Sara turned and looked through the window to watch him. He walked over to William's bed, turned to the ventilator and switched it off. The beeping of the heart monitor slowed slightly as William was left to breath on his own.

"_And the raven, never flitting, still is sitting, still is sitting_

_On the pallid bust of Pallas just above my chamber door;"_

The beeping got slower and slower.

"_And his eyes have all the seeming of a demon's that is dreaming._

_And the lamplight o'er him streaming throws his shadow on the floor;"_

The beeps slowed to a stop. Sara sobbed into Grissom's chest and he let a tear fall.

"_And my soul from out that shadow that lies floating on the floor_

* * *

_**In loving memory of Nelly Swanton**_

_**1923 – 2002**_

**The poem in this chapter is called "The Raven" by Edgar Allan Poe and was quoted by Grissom in "Got Murder?"**


	15. Gazing out into the sunset

* * *

William's funeral was held a few days after his death in the small church of the town he lived in. It appeared that he was very well known and, of course, Sara, Grissom and Carrie had been hard at work to find every single one of his fostered and adopted children, those that were still alive. There were over two hundred as William had continued fostering up until he had gotten sick. It was a beautiful ceremony and several of the 'family' said readings and poems that reminded them all of William. Sara herself read the extract of 'The Raven' that she had heard in her dream. William had requested that when he died he would be cremated and so Sara respected his wishes and after the funeral mostly everyone convened around the boardwalk behind his house to spread his ashes into the sea.

Sara sat, that evening, on the edge of the boardwalk, staring out into the horizon with her feet dangling in the water, her shoes laying next to her. She heard a pair of boots getting closer to her, gently thumping on the wooden planks, but she didn't turn around to greet them. She knew who it was.

"You ok out here?" Grissom's voice came from above her.

"I'm fine." She whispered.

"You sure? Do you need anything?" he asked.

"Stay with me." She said. For the second time, he couldn't say no to her. He slipped off his shoes and socks and sitting next to her.

They stayed silent for a while, just gazing at the sunset, before Sara spoke. "Grissom?"

"Mmm?" he mumbled as a sign he was listening but not looking at her.

"I never got a chance to apologise…what I mean is…I'm sorry I snapped at you." She rushed.

"Sara," Grissom took her hand and looked at her. "there is absolutely no need for you to apologise, ok? A lot happened to you in an obscenely small amount of time and you needed a release."

"But I still had no excuse to blame you for William's death. I mean, I love you and how do I shoe it? By yelling at you for helping me. God, I'm awful."

"No you're not." Grissom said forcefully. He squeezed her hand tighter and stroked his thumb over the back of her knuckles. "You are the most incredible, intelligent, caring woman I have ever had the fortune to meet and…" he looked at her. "you love me?"

Sara smiled and leant forwards to brush her lips against his. "I never stopped Gil." She rested her head on his shoulder and he brought his arm around her shoulders.

"So, what happens now?" Grissom said after a while.

"What d'you mean?" Sara mumbled, resting her head on his shoulder.

"I mean what happens now? I have to go back to Vegas in a few days. You inherited William's house so you could stay here or…"

"Or what Griss?" she smirked and lifted her head to look at him.

Grissom smiled at her and kissed her softly. "Come with me."

She smiled. "I assume Carrie told you I quit my job here then?"

"Why would you assume that?" he raised an eyebrow at her.

"Well," Sara patted his knee. "Carrie is the only person I told and you haven't commented on anything work related while you've been here, not that I'm complaining." Sara kissed him. "But ok."

"You sure?" he rubbed has hand up and down Sara's arm.

"I'm sure. I want to be with you." She said. "And I made a promise to William that I'd go with you if you asked me and to be happy and I am, so this is me, being happy with you." And she kissed him long and slow.

"Mmm." he mumbled. "If this is the effect being happy makes you I have to remember to cheer you up more often." He leaned forwards to snatch another kiss but she dodged him and stood up.

"It's getting late, we should be getting to bed." She said while walking towards the house.

Grissom stood up and jogged to her. "But I'm not tired."

She looked at him over her shoulder. "Neither am I." and she winked at him.

* * *

**I apologise for the shortness of this chapter but it's kind of the doorway between 'Manic Depression Land' and 'Fluffytopia'. Also, my muse had gone walkies so this was a bit of a struggle. I wanna take this opportunity to thank everyone for the fantastic reviews I've had so far for this fic! I was so proud and happy when y'all got past 100! Thanky! Oh, by the way, had my prom on the 5****th**** and it ROCKED!!! Had a hummer limo and lots of champagne! T'was very fun! Last thing, for those of you who are going "what the hell is a boardwalk?" it's a pier but a small one for little boats and I'm sure there's another name for it but I couldn't think of it so they shall henceforth be named boardwalks! Unless that's what they're called already, in which case I've just wasted your time by mentioning it...and will someone please shoot me to stop my rambling?**


	16. Spork

* * *

Sara and Grissom woke the next morning after hours of confirming their love for one another. Grissom opened his eyes to see a pair of chocolaty orbs staring back at him.

"Good morning beautiful." He whispered. Sara smiled and snuggled closer to him.

"I'm sorry, I didn't quite catch that, would you mind repeating it?" she smirked, closing her eyes again.

Grissom wrapped his arm around her waist and kissed the corner of her mouth. "I said good morning beautiful. If you didn't hear it that time you can hear it again tomorrow morning and the morning after that and every other morning if you want."

She pressed her lips to his. "I do want. Very much. You know what else I want?"

"Enlighten me, honey."

"Food! I'm starving and I'm pretty sure that it's your fault." She grinned and jumped out of bed.

Grissom rolled onto his back and closed his eyed. "It takes two to tango you know." He mumbled.

Sara gazed at his sleepy form while she got dressed. "Well then I must say," she walked to his side of the bed and stroked his face. "you are an excellent dancer. Now get your butt up and come and get breakfast." And with that she waltzed out of the bedroom.

* * *

Half an hour later when Grissom had finally gotten up and had a shower, he walked into the kitchen to find Sara washing up and Carrie heaving a large suitcase along the floor.

"Here, Carrie, let me help you with that." Grissom said, picking up the suitcase and nearly dropping it again from the weight of it. "Damn! What've you got in here?"

Carrie laughed and helped him tug the suitcase down the hall to the front door. "It's just clothes and things. I didn't know how long I was going to stay so I packed everything but the kitchen sink." She smiled.

Grissom looked confused again. "Don't you live here?"

Carrie smiled at him. "No, I live about an hour away. Sara and I used to be roommates before she moved in here. I live with this woman now, she's a cop. I don't like her much, bit of a man eater ya' know? She's blonde and she shows it. Sofia something or other." She opened the door and Grissom dragged the suitcase out to her car. Once it was hauled into the boot, Sara joined them outside.

"I wondered where you'd gone." She said.

Grissom kissed her and smiled. "Carrie was just telling me about her new best friend."

Carrie snorted. "Hardly! I was telling him about Spork."

Sara laughed and hugged Carrie. "Thank you for everything, Carrie. I love ya' sis!"

"Me too." She turned to Grissom and embraced him too. "Nice to have met you Gil. I know you'll make Sara happy." She got into her car and started the engine. "Hey Sara, we have to get together again before the wedding." She called.

Sara looked confused. "Who's wedding?"

Carrie just smiled, winked and drove off. Sara looked at Grissom, who just wrapped his arms around her waist and kissed her. "Why did Carrie call her new roommate 'Spork'?"

Sara giggled. "Well I came up with it. Carrie was complaining how Sofia never did anything like washing or cooking and I said she was like a Spork, you know, those little spoon-forks you get with small tins or cartons of fruit salad. The name's just stuck since then. Obviously, Spork is totally oblivious to it."

Grissom just smiled and kissed her again. "We should get going soon." They started walking back to the house. "What're you going to do with the house?" he asked Sara.

"Well, I thought I'd keep it. Maybe rent it our or something, but I don't want to sell it. Then I could pass it down to our…um…" she stopped talking and busied herself with opening the door, rushing through it and hurrying up the stairs. Grissom followed her and found her in the bedroom packing the final things into her bag. He sat on the bed next to her and watched her.

"You were going to say kids weren't you?" he asked after a while. Sara froze and looked at him.

"Would that freak you out?" she asked, carefully.

He thought for a moment. He saw images of himself with a little baby wrapped in a blue blanket in his arms. It had his curly brown hair and Sara's eyes and mouth. Then he saw himself playing baseball with his son and Sara cradling another baby in her arms, this time in a pink blanket. Finally, he saw his son receiving a Nobel prize for accomplishments in forensics, while his daughter got a grant to study Entomology. He smiled at Sara.

"Not in the slightest." He said.

* * *

**Thank you for the fantastic reviews I've had from people, they really do give me the inspiration I need! Also, I've submitted a challenge on YTDAW for a Doctor Who themed fic, so have a crack at it! Thank you and good night!!!**


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